If you’re experiencing changes to your body due to the hormonal transition which occurs during the menopause journey, the RAIN mindfulness technique can help you power through these changes with a positive, productive, and empowering mindset. There’s no doubt the journey brings about a sense of loss and even grief for some women+, as the changes can impact your mind, body, and spirit.
Try this mindfulness RAIN script to manage “change”
This mindfulness script for the menopause journey is from a pausitive health webinar with expert, Denise Shields, PhD, a grief coach and international mindfulness teacher.
During the webinar, she provided coping strategies for menopausal grief and a sense of loss. Then, Dr. Shields walked attendees through a mindfulness practice known as RAIN to manage the changes that come with the menopause journey.
RAIN stands for:
Recognize
Acknowledge
Inquire
Nurture
A mindfulness practice can help both validate your feelings and help you move beyond them by bringing attention to what you’re experiencing.
You can use this script to manage menopausal changes or the loss of a loved one, an opportunity, or a change in something you really care about.
Start your mindfulness experience by listening to this excerpt at 26:00 or reading the script.
Start by paying attention to your breath.
What’s showing up here?
How do I need to care for this?
It’s an amazing antidote that many webinar participants found it to be extremely helpful.
1. Recognize your breath and the change you’re experiencing.
Notice your breath moving through your body as you walk through these steps. Where do you feel it most in the body – your chest or abdomen?
Then, bring to mind a change you’re experiencing now like symptoms related to your menopause journey.
- What change are you experiencing?
- Is it difficulty sleeping or brain fog?
- Or maybe you can’t do the same things you could physically do a few years ago.
- Maybe it’s coming to grips with the reality that your child-bearing years are over once you’ve reached the point of menopause (have gone 12 consecutive months without a period). Perhaps you have mixed feelings about your children growing up and moving away or find yourself in a role reversal with your parents. As a result, some women+ may feel a loss of identity.
Take a moment to allow this reality to be as full as it wants to be right now. Focus on this change and what it means for you personally.
2. Allow the emotion you feel to be present by naming it.
See if you can bring awareness to the many sensations you may feel in your body when you really pay attention. Also begin to recognize any emotions that might be present. Is there a sense of tension, like maybe not wanting the changes underway or actually feeling resistance to them? Is it anger or perhaps awareness of a heaviness or signs of sadness – tears or feelings of vulnerability?
See if you can name this for yourself.
Anger is here, or this is sadness.
Once you’ve named your feelings, try to just sit with them in the moment. They aren’t good or bad; they are your feelings, no more and no less. Notice your breath. Allow your emotions in and the experience of sadness, disappointment, or whatever else you might be feeling.
3. Inquire about it by being curious.
Now, let’s take a moment and inquire about what else is going on. Bring your awareness to the thoughts you are thinking right now. What is the narrative you hear as you allow in the emotions? Don’t judge them. Just notice them. Observe. What else do you notice? Are there are other emotions or sensations in your body? Maybe there’s a tightness or a feeling of relaxation or relief that has presented. So, notice and be curious about what’s arisen.
4. Nurture yourself by speaking kind words and offering a compassionate touch.
Now, we’ll move to the nurture part of RAIN. Speak kind words to yourself. It might be something like “I’m sorry that you’re experiencing this.”
Talk to yourself as you would to a loved one or someone you care for deeply who is suffering and experiencing grief around all the life changes taking place.
As you do this, experiment with the words that feel comfortable for you. It might feel awkward if you’ve never tried doing this before.
But awkwardness won’t kill you, so encourage yourself to be OK with feeling uncomfortable so you can learn this really powerful way to nurture yourself, be kind, and discover soothing comfort. Next, move to the next step.
Try compassionate touch. Place your hands in the heart space. Just notice how comforting that might be for you. Or try stroking your cheek like you might when wiping away a child’s tears.
Experiment with different ways to combine a compassionate touch with kind words that acknowledge things are hard right now, and it’s okay not to be okay with it. Allow yourself to take things in so you can move forward with whatever’s next.
As you close this practice, go ahead and take an intentional breath. Breathe deeply and exhale.
Open your eyes. Notice any shift you experienced through this brief mindfulness and self-compassion exercise.
Making this a habit
So, you have just experienced the practice of RAIN!
It is a very useful mindfulness strategy you can use at any time. We don’t always have the time to go through the whole RAIN practice. And you don’t always need to every time. Sometimes, just naming or recognizing an emotion is enough.
But it can still be very helpful to take a few moments to care for yourself in this way.
When we live in the moment and nurture ourselves, we are free to allow in thoughts about what the best course for us might be.
You don’t have to do this alone. This is a starting point. Reach out to others for help and support.
At pausitive health, we have a community of women+ going through the menopause journey. Join them and enroll in our membership program!
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Access a one-stop menopause journey digital destination that provides personalized text messages that focus on educational topics you select and offers many other features such as a diet assessment with recommendations, solutions from collaboration partners to address menopausal aches and pains (the musculoskeletal syndrome of menopause – MSM), pelvic floor issues, virtual care, lifestyle tools, and a supportive community.
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